Monday, January 20, 2020

Animal People (GLOG NPCs and races)

    The g_ds were busy in the far west (before it all came crashing down). Archeologists and graverobbers will tell you the oceans in that part of the world are littered with half-finished continents — sheets of salt-flats dragged up from the floor, awkward and shapeless mountain ranges, the occasional unsecured landmass drifting with the current. A few of these were peopled with new designs for mankind. Rookmen, Crowmen, Chickenmen, Opossumen, Halomen, Wormmen, Harvestermen, Centipedemen. The ports of the west are packed with these ridiculous creatures. Some have value as mercenaries, scouts or ditchdiggers. Others are good for little more than the poorhouse.
     Provided below are stat blocks for wandering NPC's and templates for first-level GLOG characters. If you prefer character race to be independent of class, here are three different tables for that. You can only choose to gain the character templates at first level, unless your DM is running a very strange game.


   Widely disliked and distrusted. Known to be cunning, treacherous, of low moral character, and unreliable in a fight. Keep your distance from Rookmen they say; or, if you must interact, keep one hand on your gun and the other on your wallet. Wild ravens are known to report everything they see and hear to evil wizards.
Source: Ravenman by Anubish

1d6 Rook Bastards (on a result of 1 or 6, one is a Rook Crusher)
HD 2, AC as Leather, Morale 5, Move as Human
Attack: matchet, 1d6 slashing with +2 to-hit.
Mockery: Bastards can mimic any sound almost perfectly. If they are mimicking a voice you are familiar with, you can tell it's a little low and muffled.
Beat-In: If a Bastard makes a successful attack against an enemy, one other adjacent Bastard can make an attack against that enemy as well. This continues until someone misses or you run out of nearby Bastards. 

Rook Crusher
HD 3, AC as Chain, Morale 7, Move as Human
Attack: iron bar, 1d10 blunt with +3 to-hit.
Mockery: as a Rook Bastard.
Beat-Out: If a Crusher scores a critical hit or rolls maximum damage on a normal hit, their opponent is knocked down.

Character Class: Rookman
  • A: Rook, Bad Reputation, +1 HP
Rookmen can eat uncooked, rotten or not-yet-dead food as ordinary rations.  You can mimic any sound and speak in any voice you have heard, though intelligent people will notice that familiar voices are a little hoarse. If your Wisdom score is lower than your Constitution score, swap the two.
Bad Reputation
As a Rookman, most civilized people consider you a menace and view you with suspicion. Hirelings charge double while in your service. You get a +2 bonus to any check which could benefit from the discomfort and fear you cause in others, and suffer a -2 penalty to any check which could benefit from trust and cooperation.




Noble and good, but easily distractable. Less pretty and less vain than their Rookmen cousins. Cautious of unfamiliar or dangerous situations. Wild crows are known to eat the eyes of the unburied dead as a favor to mankind.
Source: Crowman by Colorblind

1d6 Crow Wanderers (on a result of 1 or 6, one is a Crow Captain)
HD 2, AC as Leather, Morale 5, Move as Human
Attack: shortsword, 1d6 slashing with +2 to-hit.
Mockery: Wanderers can mimic any sound almost perfectly. If they are mimicking a voice you are familiar with, you can tell its a little high and scratchy.
Tactical Sense: If a Wanderer makes a successful attack against an enemy, one other adjacent Wanderer can make an attack against that enemy as well. This continues until someone misses or you run out of nearby Wanderers.
Crow Captain
HD 3, AC as Chain, Morale 7, Move as Human
Attack: greatsword, 1d10 slashing with +3 to-hit.
Mockery: as a Crow Wanderer.
Mastery: If a Captain scores a critical hit or rolls maximum damage on a normal hit, their opponent's shield is destroyed. If their opponent is not carrying a shield, their weapon is destroyed instead.

Character Class: Crowman
  • A: Crow, Good Reputation, +1 HP
Crowmen can eat uncooked, rotten or not-yet-dead food as ordinary rations.  You can mimic any sound and speak in any voice you have heard, though intelligent people will notice that familiar voices are a little pitchy. If your Wisdom score is lower than your Constitution score, swap the two.
Good Reputation
As a Crowman, most people consider you an emblem of good luck. You may be approached in the street by people who want to touch your feathers or ask you to kiss their baby. Innkeepers will lower their rates by half for your party, and shopkeepers may offer bargains or special product.




Chickens are drastically less adorable when they have opposable thumbs and are seven feet tall. The hens are brutal authoritarians who understand only linear hierarchy — NO EQUALITY BUT THE STOCKPOT, they cry. The roosters have an egalitarian streak and cheerfully admit that everyone else is equally inferior. Chickenmen are a minority in the human lands, for now, but it is not in their nature to submit.
Source: Die Hoenderman by Ben-G-Geldenhuys

1d6 Pullets
HD 1*, AC as Leather, Morale 8, Move as Human
Attack: a flurry of kicks and bites, 1d8 piercing/tearing with +1 to-hit.
Flock: A group of Pullets travel together for safety while seeking a Rooster or Cockerel. By definition they are accompanied by no children, lay no eggs, and have no permanent settlement.
Pecking Order: One Pullet is the lowest in the pecking order, and has 2 HP. The next is second-lowest, with 4, and so on. All Pullets hate one another, and are eager to betray whoever is immediately above them in the pecking order or abandon whoever is immediately lower.
Galliform: Pullets can leap twenty feet and may choose to do this in combat instead of attacking. Their claws let them balance on any structure that can bear their weight, and their feathers keep them comfortable in all weather. They are as proud as the Devil.
1d6 Hens
HD 2*, AC as Leather, Morale 10, Move as Human
Attack: a flurry of kicks and bites, 1d8 piercing/tearing with +2 to-hit.
Brood: A group of Hens are the harem of a Rooster, and cooperate to protect their seraglio and chicks. They will die rather than allow an outsider to reach their nests, and never roll Morale checks or saves vs Fear while defending them.
Pecking Order: as a Pullet, but the lowest has 3 HP, second lowest 6 &c.
Galliform: as Pullet, but may leap thirty feet.
HD 2, AC as Leather, Morale 10, Move as Human
Attack: a flurry of kicks and bites, 1d8 piercing/tearing with +2 to-hit.
Errant: Cockerels wander the land searching for adventures (to prove their worth) and suitable strongholds (to protect their wealth and women). They may be willing to cooperate with PCs purely for the sake of reputation.
Wrath: In combat, after the first drop of blood has been shed, a Cockerel may choose to enter wrath. Their melee attacks deal maximum damage while in wrath, and they receive the maximum damage from all attacks against them. They exit wrath on a 2-in-6 chance at the end of every turn.
Galliform: as Pullet.
HD 3, AC as Chain, Morale N/A, Move as Human
Attack: a frenzy of claws and beak, 1d12 piercing/tearing with +3 to-hit.
Jealous: Roosters are called Roosters because of their habit of perching somewhere hidden to observe their territory. They are as difficult to find as a secret door, and automatically surprise if they choose to attack from hiding. They never roll Morale under any circumstances.
Wrath: As a Cockerel, but they enter and exit wrath at-will on the beginning and end of their turn.
Galliform: as Pullet, but may leap thirty feet.

Character Class: Chickenman
  • A: Galliform, Enforcement/Defiance
Your clawed feet and hands give you a 1d8 unarmed attack. You can balance on any structure which can support your weight, you can jump twenty feet, and you have a thick layer of feathers which give you an unarmored AC as Leather. You can't wear clothing or armor that has not been extensively modified and you can never wear boots. If your Wisdom is higher than your Charisma, swap the two scores.
If you gain the Enforcement template you cannot gain Defiance.
You are a Chickenman who takes your role seriously. The human nations will collapse under their own corrupt bulks, the Chickenmen will rise, and claw and beak will hold dominion unto the three corners of the world. You have Wrath as a Cockerel, and know the secret language of the Red Crest Society.
If you gain the Defiance template you cannot gain Enforcement.
You are a highly unusual Chickenman. For reasons known only to you you have been, effectively, exiled from Chook society. Other Chickenmen shun you. You will never settle down in a fortified coop to raise your children or pile up your gold. You will never again bow your head to anyone; not Chicken, Man or King. You have a +4 bonus to saves against any mind altering effect, and know the secret language of the Black Feather Society.




These kind-hearted creatures reach adulthood by age ten and are dead before their twentieth year. They are at peace with their short lives and strive to do as much good as possible — OR AS OPOSSUMBLE AHAHA.
Source: Opossum portrait by Silverfox5213

1d6 Opossum Monks (on a result of 1 or 6, one is an Opossum Martyr)
HD 1, AC as unarmored, Morale 7, Move as Human
Attack: A delicate nibble, 1 piercing damage.
Marsupial: The monks can climb natural surfaces and structures (such as cave walls and trees) as if they were ladders.
Triage: The monks can heal 1 HP per monk per day (2 if encountered in their monastery). They usually offer their services for free, prioritizing the most injured first, but they can be convinced to shuffle their list for a large gift to their Order.
Opossum Martyr
HD 3, AC as Plate, Morale 10, Move as Human
Attack: greatsword, 1d10 slashing with +3 to-hit.
Marsupial: as the Opossum Monk.
Interference: Once per combat round the Martyr may interpose themselves between an attack and a different target. The attack is made against the Martyr instead.

Character Class: Opossumman
  • A: Marsupial, +1 HP
You can climb natural surfaces and structures (such as cave walls and trees) as if they were ladders. You are very good at pretending to be dead — unfortunately, all intelligent creatures know this about you. You are usually safe from being attacked by bandits or marauders, and intelligent creatures will not initiate hostilities against you. If you Strength score is higher than your Charisma score, swap them.




The Halomen didn't take a boat; they just walked right over the surface of the ocean. Apparently they can do that. Halomen are much larger than a horse yet weigh less than a child, and their motives are inscrutable to us bipeds.
Believe it or not. this is the only art of a water-strider person I could find. Source: gerridi in the mist by Ksrbo

Haloman Observer
HD 5, AC as Plate, Morale 10, Move as Human on land, twice as fast over water.
Attack: a thrown javelin, 1d6 piercing with +5 to-hit, thrown 50' while retreating.
Judgment Process: The Observer is here to learn about how the small ones live and die. Their society has been unaware of ours until quite recently. They are full of questions, such as "how can you walk on water with only two podomere" and "why have all of your cities been beached so crudely".
Master of Darts: The Observer can parry melee attacks and thrown weapons.

Character Class: Haloman
  • A: Haloman, +1 Defense
You have six long, delicate legs which enable you to walk on water if not encumbered. You move at double speed while doing this. On land, you can't go anywhere that a horse and rider couldn't fit in. You sturdy carapace gives unarmored AC as Chain, but you cannot wear armor that has not been heavily modified by an expert, and you can never wear boots. If your Constitution score is higher than your Intelligence, swap them.




What the Hell? What even are they? These warped and... gummy fellows came wriggling out of the ground one day. Their decorum is irreproachable, but their accents are unintelligible. Probably best to pretend you don't notice.
Source in image

Worm Dignitary
HD 1, AC as Leather, Morale ???, Move poorly
Attack: throttling wibbly-wobbly bits, which grapple. Once grappled, save every round or lose 1d6 quarters of your maximum HP.
Limited Tangibility: The rubbery body of a Wormman is easy to hit but difficult to harm. Wormmen only take weapon damage on a critical hit, otherwise they are immune. Fire and acid are the preferred methods of wormicide.
Limited Comprehensibility: Wormmen can't really talk. Through wiggles and posing they can generally get their point across, but they really struggle in complicated matters of economics and politics. They could always use the help of a few strong-backed, weak-minded adventuring types.

Character Class: Wormman
  • A: Wormman, +1 Move
You can never, ever, ever wear any armor. Let's get that out of the way right now. Nobody makes armor for a squishy mass of elongations. You can console yourself with the same Limited Tangibility your NPC brothers get. As a Wormman, you take a full ten minutes to open a door, can never hold more than 5 slots of items, cannot use ranged weaponry, cannot use two-handed weapons, cannot see farther than 60' and cannot speak any language. On the other hand extrusion, you can writhe acros 15' gaps without slowing down, have advantage on checks to grapple, are immune to Charm and all mind-reading effects, and cannot rise as an undead. You definitely can't wear boots. If your Wisdom is higher than your Strength, swap the two scores.




Dumpy little egg-shaped torso, massive spindly legs, a small pair of beady yellow eyes. Who made these, and why? They can't even spin webs; these creatures wander the roads as helpless mendicants. Spare a coin if you feel like engaging in a little pity.
a Chitine, by Toni DiTerlizzi
Harvester Vagabond
2, AC as Chain, Morale 5, Move as Human
Attack: a shiv, 1d6 piercing with +2 to-hit. Save or come down with tetanus.

Light Step: Harverstermen make no sound when they move. They can balance on any structure which can bear their weight.
Malefactor: Harvestermen can see for 30' in total darkness, 60' in direct sunlight, and as normal on cloudy days, indoors, or by moonlight.
Frail: Harvestermen take maximum damage from all sources of fire.

Character Class: Harvesterman
  • A: Harvesterman, +1 Stealth
As a Harvester you are an experienced troublemaker and a hobbyist housebreaker. You move silently at any speed, can see 30' in total darkness, and can balance on any structure which can bear your weight. Your vision is limited to 60' in direct sunlight and you take maximum damage from sources of fire. Other than that are a fairly common sight on the road or in any major town. If your Constitution is higher than your Dexterity, swap the scores.




A human torso meets the segmented body of a huge centipede at the waist. An eyeless face hides behind a heavy thatch of hair, and an oversized mouth bristles with a double row of teeth as long and thick as fingers. Centipedemen are among the most repellent creatures the g_ds ever made. Despite this horrifying appearance, there are as many good Centipedemen as bad ones. In the end we are all someone's treasured creation.
Chopped up from Perky II by Eemeling
Centipede Watchman
4, AC as Chain, Morale 10, Move as ½ Human
Attacks: a horrible bite, save or contract leprosy. Also: a gold-plated mace, 1d6 blunt with a +4 to-hit.
Eyeless: Centipedemen can detect movement, shapes, heat, light levels, sound, scent and tactile sensation within 15' of their heads. They are otherwise incapable of detecting the world around them.
Voiceless: Centipedemen cannot vocalize.
Trigintapedal: Centipedemen actually have only fifteen pairs of legs, but that's enough to let them crawl across any surface like one of their smaller cousins.

Character Class: Centipedeman
  • A: Centipede, Cruel Joke, +2 HP
You are painfully slow, you cannot vocalize, you cannot hear sounds originating more than fifteen feet away, and you are totally blind. That's the bad news out of the way. The good news is, you have great perception of anything that happens within fifteen feet of you. You can climb on walls effortlessly and have an unarmored AC as Chain, which is pretty damn good. As usual, you cannot wear armor that has not been specially altered, and it would be much too expensive to buy fifteen pairs of boots even if they made them for giant centipedes. Whatever your lowest ability score is, swap it with Charisma.
Cruel Joke
Your kind are feared, and hated more than feared. Centipedemen occupy the lowest social strata. If people are in a good mood they will just pretend not to see you, but if they are feeling nasty you may be attacked for wandering around in the daytime. You can never gain hirelings, and your party members are the only non-centipedes who will make any effort to communicate with you as if you were a person. This malintention is so powerful that unintelligent undead cannot even perceive you.

Sunday, January 19, 2020

Monkey Dad (Class: I don't know how to categorize this one)

You are a monkey dad. You are a dad, and you are a monkey.

Class: Monkey Dad

    You are a monkey who is also a dad. Every time you gain a level in this class you will roll on the table of Monkey and/or Dad Qualities and record the result. You can't wear armor unless specially designed for monkey, but your thick hide gives you AC as leather. Your bare hands are light weapons and you can wield simple weapons. Swords, bows, guns and weapons that require more advanced manual dexterity are sadly beyond your monkiebilities. You can't speak human language, but you can understand it and can communicate through sign.

Skills: 1. Rope Climbing, 2. Formal Etiquette, 3. Woodworking

Starting Equipment: Rolled up magazine (as club), pipe and tobacco, top hat, suspenders.

  • A Atavism, Alloparenting, +1 to-hit
  • B Extremely Loud and Incredibly Hairy, +2 HP
  • C Primal Fury, +1 Defense
  • D Just Disappointed, +2 HP

    You are a monkey. You are very good at climbing things. You can hold onto objects with your "feet," stand on your hands effortlessly, stabilize yourself with your tail, jump, run, hide, steal — anything a big monkey could do.

    You are a dad. A number of party members, equal to your level, are your adoptive children. You can't change which ones are your children, but slots open up if they die. Your children gain several benefits from your patient and fatherly advice:
  • If their Strength is lower than yours, they gain +1 to-hit while in your presence. Go get 'em sport!
  • If their Dexterity is lower than yours, they gain +1 Defense while in your presence. Remember, into a jab, away from an uppercut!
  • If their Constitution is lower than yours, they gain +1 inventory slot while in your presence. There's always room to hide something else away, maybe in a sock or something.
  • If their Intelligence is lower than yours, they always get an extra save against Charm or other form of magical manipulation. You're no monkey's uncle. You're a monkey dad.
  • If their Wisdom is lower than yours, they always get an extra save against any form of Sleep or Paralysis. They know, if they're ever feeling strange or uncomfortable, you are around to help them.
  • If their Charisma is lower than yours, they always get an extra save against Fear. It's like their dad always said: "There's no shame in fear. What matters is how we face it"

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Hairy
    This is where you pound on your chest, hoot, grunt, scream, display your fangs and generally make yourself look dangerous. If you dedicate an entire turn to this threat display while in combat, a living creature within sixty feet of you must immediately roll a save vs Fear. You can do this as many times per day as you want, until someone passes the save and yells out "He's just a dad! A monkey dad!"

Primal Fury
    You've had enough of this hootenanny, and if it doesn't stop soon you might do something drastic. When an enemy within reach fumbles on an attack, you may immediately make an unarmed attack to slap a little sense into them.
    If the situation is getting too loud or scary for one of your charges, you need to do something about that too. You can shield a party with your body if their AC is lower than yours. The two of you share the worse AC and saves, and you take all damage directed against them. If someone tries to attack your party member and misses, you may immediately make an unarmed attack against them.

Just Disappointed
    You're not angry. This is your fault, really, and you should have known better. Maybe next time kiddo. Once per day, you shake your head sadly and a die must be rerolled. The die's size doesn't matter, nor does its purpose. Powerful wizards won't appreciate it if you meddle with them directly, but probably they can't do anything about it.

family monkey babie monkie dbaby monkey dad

Monkey and/or Dad Qualities

Roll 1d12 and consult the list. If you roll something twice, take your choice of the one above or below.
  1. My Father Left Me Monkey
    Whatever languages you can understand, your children can speak while in your presence.

  2. A Monkey in Time
    When your children wake up in the morning, they know your distance from them (rounded to the nearest five miles) and in what direction you lie (rounded to sixteenths of a compass).

  3. The Last of Monkey
    You can carry one child, no matter how large they are, and still run and fight effectively.

  4. To Kill a Monkeybird
    Your children get a bonus to reaction rolls from members of different races equal to your level in Monkey Dad.

  5. Go Set a Watchmonkey
    Your children inflict a penalty to morale rolls from members of different races equal to your level in Monkey Dad.

  6. Monkey's in the Cradle
    Your children gain the normal benefits of Alloparenting even if you are not present, so long as you are still alive.

  7. My Monkey's Eyes
    Your children heal an extra hitpoint every day while traveling with you.

  8. Big Monkey
    You can turn into a catfish at will.

  9. Do Not Go Monkey
    While in combat, if you are reduced to zero hitpoints and would die you instead enter a last state of frenzy. You regain all of your hitpoints for the duration of the encounter. If you are again reduced to zero hitpoints, or when the encounter ends, you die.

  10. Monkey Was a Rolling Stone
    Whatever skills you possess, your children can use while in your presence.

  11. The Monkey Beyond the Pines
    I'm going to be honest, this is the last one I'm writing and I don't have anything to put here. I don't know why I thought I could just write down twelve titles of things and put "monkey" in there and the ideas would flow forth. These aren't even puns. These aren't even jokes. I'm at the end of my fucking rope here. It's 5:45 where I am right now and I haven't slept or eaten in three days. What the fuck is a monkey dad? This is awful. I'm hitting publish as soon as I have finished this sentence.

  12. The Monkey
    When you die, select a party member. They are the dad now, whether they are a monkey or not. Your other children gain the benefits of Alloparents from traveling with the new dad.

Thursday, January 2, 2020

To the Death (Class: Monk)

This is a Mortal Kombat ninja, (sort of), inspired by the OSR Discord.

Class: Palette Swapped Ninja

    You are a follower of the Do-Cide, the Many-Colored Art, the Way of Mortal Combat. Its students learn how to crush bones and tear meat with their bare hands. The brightly colored gi of the devotees are a form of aposematism, warning that interlopers will have to face the terrible chromatic fists of the Palette Swapped Ninja.
    You get +1 to Stealth for every template you have in this class. You also gain one Chi Die and one special move every time you level up. If you have at least one template from this class, you can never fumble while using staves, knives, flails or shortswords. You can wear light armor only.

Skills: 1. Interpretive Dance, 2. Rope Climbing, 3. Poisoning

Starting Gear: Brightly colored gi (as leather), matching mask, grapnel on 30 feet of rope (see below), one additional element of Ninja Gear.
  • A: Gi, Chi, Low Strike, +1 HP
  • B: Block, Throw, +1 To-Hit
  • C: Fatality, High Strike, +1 HP
  • D: Chameleon, Secret Technique, Extra Attack

    Choose or roll from the following list:
  1. Red, representing the element of Force.
  2. Yellow, representing the element of Fire.
  3. Green, representing the element of Lizards.
  4. Cyan, representing the element of Ice.
  5. Blue, representing the element of Death.
  6. Magenta, representing the element of Lightning.
    These are the six colors of the world and the six elements which make up the world. Every material object is constructed from them, and every immaterial object represents them.
    Every Palette Swap wears a gi and a mask in one of the six sacred colors. You need to be wearing both the gi and the mask in order to access your special moves or your Fatalities.

    Kung-fu, the ancient physical art taught to mankind by the g_ds. Chi, the primal energy which fuels it. You have a pool of eight-sided Chi Dice equal to your level which you expend when executing a strike or a special move. These return to the pool with one minute of restful and undisturbed meditation.
I don't know how you should recover CD.
I'm waffling between "one minute of meditation" and "like MD but also you get them all back with an hour". The first is better for out-of-combat moves; the second would mean you could do more kung-fu in a fight. You may wish to tweak recovery if you use this class.

Low Strike
    A kick, a knee, or a jab at the gut. When you make an unarmed attack or an attack with a light weapon (including throwing), you may choose to expend one or more CD. If you hit them the attack deals damage equal to the highest die result. This is never lethal if you don't want it to be.

    While less useful in longer fights, a well-timed block can be the difference between survival and a fatality. When you are targeted by an attack, you can reduce incoming damage by expending any number of CD. Roll them all, returning them to the pool as appropriate, and reduce incoming damage by 2 for every die rolled.

    Sometimes punching people to death is impractical. Sometimes it's better to toss them into the gigantic flaming acid sawblades which they keep in their living room. When you hit an enemy with an unarmed attack, you can move them five feet in any direction for every CD you invested.

     Once per day you may execute a legendary martial art which scholars refer to as a Fatality. In a perfect world these would be reserved for tournaments and ceremonies, but an employer or companion may have a more profane use for your sacred techniques.
  1. Red: Telekinetic Slam
    A single target makes a Save with a bonus equal to their HD. If they fail, they are lifted off the ground and slammed back down, repeatedly. They are incapacitated and take 1d8 damage a round for four rounds.
  2. Yellow: TOASTY!
    You remove your mask and breathe a line of fire thirty feet long from your mouth. Everyone in that line makes a Save with a bonus equal to their HD. If they fail, they take 4d8 fire damage and are on fire.
  3. Green: Tasty Meal
    You remove your mask and attempt to devour a single target. They make a Save with a bonus equal to their HD. If they fail, they take 4d8 damage from your horrific teeth. If this damage kills them they are swallowed whole and you heal 4d8 hitpoints.
  4. Cyan: Ice Skateboard
    A single target makes a Save with bonus equal to their HD. If they fail, they are frozen solid for one minute. They cannot take damage while in this form but they can be picked up and carried.
  5. Blue: Spine Rip
    A single target makes a Save with a bonus equal to their HD. If they fail, you rip their head off with the spine still attached. Everyone who has a reason to be afraid of you makes a Morale check. This move can only be used on humanoids with 4HD or fewer.
  6. Magenta: When Lightning Strikes
    You select up to four targets within two-hundred feet. Four lightning bolts strike, each dealing 1d8 damage. These lightning bolts can be assigned to any of the targets and a Save (with a bonus equal to HD) is made for each.
    The names may sound a little silly translated, but they strike fear into the heart of the well-versed scholar.

High Strike
    A snap-kick, a flying knee, a blow to the jaw. Your unarmed attacks deal +1 damage for every CD invested.

    You can change schools as easily as changing your clothes. In fact, you do this by changing your clothes. You can wear any color of gi you own, and you gain all the features of that color.

Secret Technique
    Invent a sequence of three strikes, throws and special moves. Once a day you may execute this sequence as a single attack. Negotiate with your DM and come up with a goofy name.

Special Moves (D8):

Think of these as spells you can cast many times a day, with no chance of mishap, and without as much flash. You use these by expending Chi Dice.
  1. Flying Leap
    A long distance jump where you soar as if carried aloft by wires. Takes you [best]*10 feet across and [dice]*5 feet up. You have to shout "Yyaaaaaaaa!" in real life, or else it doesn't count.
  2. Rope Trick
    A thrown grapnel will stick to any surface for [dice] rounds. A rope attached can hold any weight without breaking. Anyone climbing the rope will move at triple the usual speed, even if the rope has no knots, even if it's free-hanging.
  3. Cling
    To scale a glass window, leap around on power lines, or hang upside-down by your toes. You can grab onto any surface as if it were a ladder for [best]+[dice] rounds.
  4. Vanish
    Slam your fist into your palm and disappear with a puff of smoke. You reappear in an area you plausibly could have reached in [dice] rounds.
  5. Waterwalk
    Treat water as if it were solid for [dice] rounds. Note that a large wave is much more dangerous if it's a solid block of heavy material collapsing on you, so it's probably best to save this one for moats and ponds and such.
  6. Shuriken
    Toss [dice] ninja stars at opponents within thirty feet. They only deal 1 point of damage each, but they're so surprising that you have +[best] to-hit. Roll a separate attack for each star. They appear from nowhere and disappear after a few minutes.
  7. Divert
    You can alter the flow of chi in another's body. With time and patience can use this ability to heal, restoring [dice] HP to a willing target with ten minutes of pressure-point massaging. If you are in a hurry, and not trying to heal your target, you can stun them for [dice] rounds with a successful attack roll. All attacks against a stunned target are rolled with advantage and the stun end when they take any damage.
  8. Neck Snap
    If someone is totally unaware of your presence, you can attempt an instant-kill twist on their precious vertebrae. Make an attack and roll your CD. If the attack hits and [sum] is greater than the target's HP, you break their neck silently. If you miss or [sum] is too small, you grab their head and yank while they panic and yell. 
Each of the six colors of ninja have access to a unique, more combat-focused special move. You get this special move automatically at the first level.
  • Red: Teleport Punch
    Choose a target within [dice]*20 feet and roll an unarmed attack. If it hits, you teleport behind them and roundhouse-kick them to the ground as a low strike. If it misses, you teleport immediately in front of them with your back turned and they get a free attack against you.
  • Yellow: Spear
    A serpent-like coil of chain shoots out of your wrist. Make a ranged attack against someone within forty feet of you; if it hits, they take [best] damage and are pulled [dice]*10 feet towards you.
  • Green: Acid Spit
    You can focus your chi into the throat chakra and vomit a stream of toxic slime at a point or a target within forty feet. When used against a person, this is a low strike at range which deals acid damage. When used on a point, the acid lingers for [dice] rounds and deals 1d8 damage to anyone who passes through it.
  • Cyan: Ice Blast
    You can make two ranged attacks against two targets within forty feet. This is a low strike at range and deals cold damage.
  • Blue: Ghost Ball
    You project a wave of graveyard energy at a target within [dice]*5 feet. They are overwhelmed with a horror of death, and can not attack during their next turn. Ineffective on anyone immune to fear.
  • Magenta: Mind Control Orb
    You conjure a small sphere of crackling energy and toss it at someone within forty feet. If it connects, you can command their legs to move them [dice]*5 feet in any direction

And now, the ninja gear:
  1. Brightly Colored Gi. Something like a silk tabard. Light, breathable, easy to move around in. Costs 10 gold to replace if it is damaged or if you want a new one. While carried: 2 slots. While worn: 0.

  2. Brightly Colored Mask. A wooden or ceramic mask and a silk hood which conceal everything except the eyes. The mask should match your gi if you want to benefit from your special moves. Costs 5 gold to replace if it is damaged or if you want a new one. 

  3. Grappling hook and thirty feet of rope. One slot each.

  4. Nunchuks. A light club with +1 to-hit in melee. On a fumble you take 1 damage from smacking yourself with the damn thing. 1 slot.

  5. Tiger's Hands. Gloves with spikes covering the palm. You can climb trees and embankments like a ladder, but you can't use or hold anything that requires manual dexterity. Takes one minute to don or doff.

  6. Blowpipe and 10 darts. As a shortbow -1, but can be concealed in a sleeve. 1 slot each.

  7. Swordcane. A light blade concealed in a walking stick. It takes about thirty seconds to unscrew, and anyone who picks the cane up will immediately notice that it is much too heavy. Can also be used as a light club. 1 slot.

  8. Centipede Poison. This isn't centipede venom. Centipede venom is totally different. Centipede poison is made out of stewed centipedes, and causes violent hallucinations for 1d6 rounds upon ingestion, no save. Armed victims may attack bystanders. Three doses.

  9. Pepperer. A six-inch length of bamboo filled with caustic substances. If you blow into it, everyone in a fifteen foot cone (including you) must save or become blind for 1d6 hours. If you know it's coming and close your eyes you get +4 bonus to the save.

  10. Glass Poniard. A light weapon which breaks the first time it deals damage. If the blade is lodged in flesh, the victim takes 1d6 damage every time they roll a d20 (attacks, ability checks, move checks &c). 1 slot.

  11. Dog Call. A glass whistle which can be easily crushed under a boot. The sound is irritating to animals, supernatural creatures and small children. Adults can't hear it. Elves must save or attack the source of the sound.

  12. Calligraphy Set. Brushes, inks, parchment, all the necessary bric-a-brac to assemble a nice set of scrolls. Doesn't give you the ability to write. 1 slot.

  13. Iron Fan. Can be used as either a shield or a light club. Cannot be thrown. 1 slot.

  14. Chain Kama. A strange combination of a flail and a sickle which must be used in two hands. Counts as a pair of light weapons. The chain can be used to make grapple attempts at a distance of 10 feet. 2 slots.

  15. Dulcet Wires. A complicated little lamellophone that is held in the mouth. Makes your voice much softer and higher. If held in the mouth backwards and upside down, makes your much voice rougher and lower. Someone with a high enough voice could mimic a child and someone with a low enough voice could mimic an orc.

  16. Vessel Breaker. A poison which causes horrendous bleeding from every orifice within twenty-four hours of ingestion. A casting of restoration can save the victim; otherwise, exsanguination is certain within another twenty-four hours. The punishment for carrying this substance is death by flensing. Three doses.

  17. Weighted Net. A fine mesh net filled with small lead weights, throwable as a light weapon. Allows for grapple attempts at range. 2 slots.

  18. Face Paint. A set of paints in the six sacred colors. They bind to human skin for twenty-four hours or until removed with alcohol. 1 slot.

  19. Smoke Bombs. A small bag of ten smoke bombs. These produce a cloud of smoke in a five-foot cube when thrown. The smoke lasts for a round. Anyone who breathes in the smoke must save or become a little bit dizzy maybe for 1d6 rounds. More smoke bombs can be purchased cheaply from any alchemist.

  20. An oddity from the storerooms of your distant mountain temple. Roll 1d6:
    • 1. The Tao. You aren't supposed to be able to write this thing down, but somebody managed it and now the masters don't know what to do with the scroll.
    • 2. Centipede Venom. Causes horrific swelling and necrosis, reducing every stat by 1d6. Must be injected by a piercing weapon. You have to squeeze about fifteen-thousand centipedes to get a dose of this stuff. One dose.
    • 3. Solid Gold Katana With Gems Studded Along The Blade. This legendary and expensive weapon is far more dangerous than even a masterwork bastard sword. As a large weapon, but deals 2d6 instead of 1d10 damage. You must pass a Charisma check to draw the blade; otherwise, the blade doesn't think the fight is illustrious enough to participate in. 4 slots (this thing is fucking heavy). 
    • 4. Left thumb of the Buddha. Someone ambushed him while he was on a walk and killed him. Again, the masters don't really know what to do.
    • 5. Cosmic Egg. A sapphire as big as a human brain. Tradition holds that it will hatch into the next universe. Worth 100 gold to the right collector. 2 slots.
    • 6. Three-Part Staff. Some idiot tried to fix a walking stick with rope. Now it's just too much of a nunchuk. One slot.